If you would have asked me about a week ago what my plans were for life, I would not have been able to tell you. I was so beat down that I thought I would never be able to get up.
Sometimes when you get to this point you do pretty reckless things and that I did.
Turns out that bottling things up and hiding who you really are for so long can really do some amazing things to your mind.
I am so blessed to have close friends who have not given up on me and have never batted an eye at anything I have done or said. The same goes for my husband who could not be more supportive of me.
I have yet to really face my issues head on, but I know I am plenty of steps closer this week than I was last week. It took me hitting rock bottom to get to that point, but I now know I'm going to be okay.
This past weekend I burnt a crap-ton of calories in an effort to sweat out the toxic emotions I was feeling, which turned into me gorging on plenty of beers and a ridiculously large burger that probably had a calorie count that rivaled what I burnt with my 10k last Thursday. I didn't care though, because I needed to eat something without feeling guilty and it was epic.
I had a slumber party with the baby, my dad, and stepmother at their place in my hometown Rockford, and that was therapeutic on so many levels.
I got to spend time with two of my closest friends which always is a blessing even if it was only for like an hour with one of them. :-D
I have realized in the past few days there is no sense in being afraid anymore.
I can't wait to figure everything out because I'm ready to be who I want to be.
No comments:
Post a Comment