I wish that it was as simple as a physical set-back, but unfortunately it was my emotional wall of strength that I have built up for a lifetime that crumbled.
For me, running and strength training aren't accomplished by my physical capabilities, but my emotional prowess. I am a headstrong person so I don't give up easily because I am able to put concerns aside to attain success.
Yet, I was caught off guard, and got the wind knocked out of me. I apologize for my vagueness in this particular situation, but it isn't something I could openly discuss, just know that it was enough for me to question myself. At the point I started to unravel, my person (Grey's Anatomy junkies will get this) was not available. Not to mention my husband was at work and my son was not being cooperative in his nap taking.
So I ran, because, well that is all I could do. When that didn't help, I was even more frustrated. It wasn't until I was on my way to work and my person called me back that I mildly chilled out. This person, has always been pretty blunt with me. She gave me the facts, "I'm sorry, but this isn't the only time this will happen in your life. This is just the first time...among many. I don't think one could ever get past it."I grumbled at the sound of the news she had just delivered, but I knew she was right.
That night I went out with a work friend, let loose, then went home to a husband who was ready for my breakdown. He helped remind me the importance of life and the blessings that we have and immediately my anger dissolved into acceptance.
Yes, I have to recharge my defenses, but I know I have plenty of help to do that. I am thankful for the people God has placed in my life to aid me in this process.
I am now more determined to become an even stronger person than I was. It might take me a while and I might be afraid, but I am eager.
Yet, I was caught off guard, and got the wind knocked out of me. I apologize for my vagueness in this particular situation, but it isn't something I could openly discuss, just know that it was enough for me to question myself. At the point I started to unravel, my person (Grey's Anatomy junkies will get this) was not available. Not to mention my husband was at work and my son was not being cooperative in his nap taking.
So I ran, because, well that is all I could do. When that didn't help, I was even more frustrated. It wasn't until I was on my way to work and my person called me back that I mildly chilled out. This person, has always been pretty blunt with me. She gave me the facts, "I'm sorry, but this isn't the only time this will happen in your life. This is just the first time...among many. I don't think one could ever get past it."I grumbled at the sound of the news she had just delivered, but I knew she was right.
That night I went out with a work friend, let loose, then went home to a husband who was ready for my breakdown. He helped remind me the importance of life and the blessings that we have and immediately my anger dissolved into acceptance.
Yes, I have to recharge my defenses, but I know I have plenty of help to do that. I am thankful for the people God has placed in my life to aid me in this process.
I am now more determined to become an even stronger person than I was. It might take me a while and I might be afraid, but I am eager.
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